"A Curmudgeon’s Thanksgiving Prayer"
A balanced view…giving equal time to pros and cons…gratitude and grumps.
by Bill Bonner
Dublin, Ireland - "We are celebrating Thanksgiving with two of our sons, our wives, and grandchildren. We will sit down to dinner of turkey, onions, stuffing, beets, pumpkin pie…and who-knows-what-else, prepared by the women of the household. Before tucking in, your editor will rise to say grace. As the oldest member of the family, it falls to him to offer up a prayer suitable to the occasion. But unlike so many others, he will not put a sugar glaze – such as you might find on the sweet potatoes – over the facts. After tapping his glass, and rising to his feet, he will give it to them, like the Jameson whiskey aperitif, straight:
"Dear Lord (or whatever power, higher or lower, might be held responsible), we have so much to be grateful for, we scarcely know where to start. So, let’s begin in the beginning.
We are thankful to be alive. Our hearts still beat. We breathe in and out and enjoy each sunrise, happily counted among the quick, rather than the dead. But many are not so lucky. The average lifespan of American males is falling rapidly. On the rise are what are called ‘deaths of despair,’ where people are so forlorn they take drugs or do themselves in. We are grateful not to be among them.
We give thanks, too, because we are not at war. Instead, we pay the Ukrainians and Israelis to do the killing, and/or dying.
Trillions (with a Capital T): Job openings are plentiful, too; that’s something to be grateful for…even though many of these jobs are not the good-paying, ‘breadwinner’ jobs our fathers had. More and more, we’re forced to take low-paying employment in the service sector in order to keep up with our credit card payments. And more than ever, people don’t work at all. Retired, disabled, worn out, witless…or just lazy…we don’t know, but they’re millions of them and they all must be supported by those of us who still get up in the morning, put our pants on and go to the jobsite.
Thank God, too, that we have plenty to eat. We’re not like those poor people in Gaza that we’re helping to starve. Here in America, we have so much food that 7 out of 10 of us are overweight. And doctors have come up with a whole new maladie – diabesity – to describe an epidemic now sweeping the country.
And we’re not broke….yet. Our Thanksgiving dinner will cost 25% more than it did 4 years ago…but a bit less than last year. And we can put the whole thing on our credit cards, and pay 21% interest on it – forever.
Yes, that is really what makes America great…it’s what we have to be especially thankful for – credit. What other country can run up $33.7 TRILLION [we will emphasize the TRILLION as if it were a demon from Hell for the benefit of the 2-year-old at the table]…and keep on borrowing?
This week’s Treasury auction (at which the federal government raises money to pay for projects it doesn’t need with money it doesn’t have) went surprisingly well. Lenders were willing to give the US government – which must be run by some of the most irresponsible numbskulls on the planet – their money in exchange for a promise to pay just 4.408% interest (on 10-year Treasuries)."
[At this point, the turkey is getting cold…and the family is looking at the wall sockets for a plug that they can pull…]
Slaves to Interest: "But wait…there’s more! There’s the latest news [we raise our right arm for dramatic effect…and take a crumpled news item from our jacket pocket]
Here’s another thing we have to be thankful for. This is America, dammit. [We’re actually in Ireland…but they will get the point]. And in America, we’re free. Sort of. Here’s an update, from Fox Business. "American taxpayers are now slaves to interest payments. Interest on the federal debt is now so immense that it’s consuming 40% of all personal income taxes. The largest source of revenue for the federal government is increasingly being devoted to just servicing the debt, not even paying it down." The problem is getting worse daily and will eventually result in even more pain for taxpayers.
The recent monthly Treasury statement from the Fiscal Service showed that the Treasury Department paid $88.9 billion in October on interest for the federal debt. That’s almost double what it paid in October of the previous year. Worse, the Treasury is projecting interest payments for the fiscal year to exceed $1 trillion. Every month that goes by, the Treasury increases that forecast as the outlook worsens.
Yes, dear…dear…family. We are now prisoners…forced to slave away to pay for things we didn’t want, didn’t get…and never will have. Like Jacob Marley, we drag the heavy chains of past perfidy…recklessness…and corruption.
A total interest of $1 trillion/year…divided among, say, 100 million families …each American family pays $10,000 per year for interest on federal debt. What exactly does it get for the money? The answer: nothing! The services and products were delivered, often so long ago that we don’t remember what they were for. A war against Iraq? Salary increases for members of Congress and federal employees? Subsidies…pay-offs…aid…agencies – where did it all go? We don’t know. All we know is that it is gone… Our generation [we will point a finger towards our own chest] spent it. And now, you, my poor, dear…dear…family…you’ll be paying for it – and much more! – all your lives. Amen."
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